What Were the Spitzers Thinking?

Many are remarking about Eliot Spitzer's extraordinarily brief and uninformative press conference yesterday, after it became known wiretaps had exposed him as a customer of an international prostitution ring. The presser amounted to little more than a 45-second photo-op, a chance for the New York governor to hold hands with his wife in public and announce his vacation plans.

Wouldn't you like to know what they were really thinking during that excruciating stage show? Well, now it can be told. The U.S. Justice Department, relying on super-secret spying technologies which the White House assures us do not require a judicial warrant, has now publicly released a transcript of the couple's thoughts as they left yesterday's press conference:

Truly, men are from Mars.